Sexual Chocolate: Flurtz Making Women Come Back for More?

Some Time Today in the PM - After being tired of seeing and moving around both packages of Flurtz chocolates to get to other food items in the pantry for the past month, I have decided to finally experiment with them. Took grape juice out of fridge to bring to room temperature, as instructed on the package of chocolate.

Okay folks, I'm going to take "food porn" to a whole new level here. Going to experiment with a pair of heart shaped milk chocolates that I received from a friend of a friend as a promotion for Flurtz Chocolates. They're suppose to "enhance" sexual pleasure. They've sat in my pantry long enough, let's give this a go shall we? I just might need to change this blog's URL to chocolateandsex.blogspot.com. I know, I don't blog for weeks and this is all I can come up with? Sorry. Anyway, now for the blow-by-blow account (pun not intended).

10:45 pm - Put away dinner dishes and ate two Flurtz heart-shaped chocolates with glass of grape juice as directed after dinner...mmm...grape juice! Chocolates aren't bad either. (You can have with wine but I don't really drink alcohol.) Now I have to wait an hour "to experience a whole new level of pleasure." *raised eye-brow* Right.

11:11 pm - After surfing Flurtz.com, uploading image to Tastespotting.com, here I am writing this entry. I notice my skin feels a bit tingly from leg to toe. Kind of feels like I just dropped a...never mind.

11:13 pm - Feeling a bit drowsy. Will I make it to 11:45 pm to cash in on the jackpot? Is there a jackpot? Who's Jack and why did they name a pot after him?

11:14 pm - By the way, dear readers, just so you know, gratefully I - WE - do not need chocolates or anything for that matter to steam things up. I'm happy to say, our sex life is, well, it's pretty damn amazing! Has been since day one, and that was four years ago. :)

11:16 pm - ...

11:29 pm - Head and face feel tingly...inhaled breath through nostrils feel extra cool - kinda' Vick's Vapor Rub'ish. Am I tired? Am I high?

11:31 pm - Hah! That was funny, just made myself laugh. Okay, so I'm easily AMUSED. Did you think I was going to say easily AROUSED? Geez. Thanks a lot. Remind me to block you from my blog.

11:32 pm - Scratching knuckles of index and middle finger on right hand.

11:35 pm - Scratching right eye.

11:36 pm - What's up with the right sided itchies? I wonder if people who blog a lot have much sex?

Sex six minutes left to take-off and counting. This Cat's not feeling especially frisky but willing to investigate further. Will be back with a full report...

~~~~~

Flurtz Follow-Up
Wednesday, June 06, 2007

My husband's Swiss-Canadian, he know chocolates, and my pet name for him is Swexy. That's just sooooo cute it makes you wanna...puke? Okay readers, you can go puke.

And when you return, I'll give you my take on Flurtz...

So, after having tried it last night, what's my take on Flurtz? Let's just say I won't be sending them a testimonial any time soon. I can't say I felt anything unusual or extraordinary before, during or after our escapades. Perhaps, Flurtz is made for those who aren't "in their body" on a regular basis...? You know, closet-freaks, the librarian who lets her hair down only at night, and only behind double-closed and triple-locked doors, and only after she's showered, brushed her teeth and brushed her cat; or the woman who thinks a sexy man pumps iron 5 days a week and spends the other 2 days taming his fuzz - waxed chest and glossy gelled hair to boot. Was that a bit harsh? Aw, you know I was just kidding with you! Kinda, maybe. No; not really.

But, in all seriousnessness, The 60% dark chocolate hearts claimed to be made with a secret blend of Chinese herbs were tastey, pretty, and well packaged but didn't deliver their promise. Once you rip open the shiny red plastic pouch and bite into these miniature hearts you'll find that at the core is a kind of smooth yet grainy, faintly fibrous center - sexy, mysterious, perfectly imperfect and yummy - beneath a glossy, super waxed, hard chocolate shell. Sorry folks, but that's where the buck stops - with flavor. So if you're ever handed a couple of Flurtz to try, no matter what your experience turns out to be, know that at very least you've got a pair of sweet treats.

As for my husband, he is my sexual chocolate. ;)

Yes, you can go puke now.


www.flurtzchocolate.com

Food | Chocolate | Sex | Review | Food Porn